Fashion Advice (or: The Horror That Was My Afternoon Coffee Break)

As I mentioned yesterday, I work in Corporate America. A very large office building of a very large company where people are, presumably, professionals. There is a dress code. Allegedly. Therefore, I should not have to be subjected to the horrors of nastyass mancleavage while innocently getting an afternoon coffee!!!!

This dude in the cafe this afternoon had his shirt unbuttoned to his freaking solar plexus. Not kidding. No t-shirt underneath. Now, some people can get away with that.

Robert Pattinson is one of those people. I don't find him especially attractive but...he's Robert Pattinson. Done.

Also? This guy:

My man Andy Gibbs was rocking that shirt back in the day when this photo was taken. We could all live without the package-master spandex pants, but the point here is the shirt.

David Beckham sporting the mancleavage? Two words: yum*.

This dude in the cafe? Not so much. His shirt was unbuttoned about as far down as Beckham's but spread about as wide as Andy Gibb's. But don't be fooled! There was no tanned, muscled, sexy-hairy or baby smooth chest on display. It was pasty white, sprinkled with a few curly hairs and seated atop a good headstart on a hideous, over-the-belt pot belly. And, may I remind you, this was AT THE OFFICE.

Oh, and there was a chain, natch.

*shudders*

Men: Do not do this! Keep your mancleavage to yourselves and your partners! And, for the love of rhinos, keep it out of the workplace!!!


*This is not a typo. Yum is actually two words when referring to David Beckham in any sense. Now quit proofreading me and pay attention to my fashion advice.